in search of carisma

Thanks to Earth's tilted rotational axis and some brilliant planning on my part, I have a 32-day gap between the end of my classes and my flight home to enjoy New Zealand's summer scene. My dorm will close, so I have no choice but to take a road trip around the country. Tough luck, I know. I'll be joined by Thorvald, my Danish classmate from CBS, as we experience glow-worm caves, bungee jumping, zorbing, the sheer excitement of sheep-shearing, and some of the world's most dramatic scenery. We agreed that the best way to travel with flexibility and convenience is to buy an inexpensive car and sell it as we leave. I'm of the opinion that this is a once-in-a-lifetime adventure, and I want it to be accompanied by a once-in-a-lifetime car. I've done some preliminary shopping, but I wanted to do my due diligence and make sure I make the right decision. Here are a few candidates:

1. 1991 Toyota Sera ~$750



Cons: Body damage on rear-right quarterpanel. Small 1.5L engine. Actually, small in general.

Pros:


It has effing gullwing doors. Short of a Lamborghini, this is the best way to cruise into our youth hostels' parking lots in epic style.



2. 1986 Daihatsu Mira ~$500



Pros: Past commercial usage indicates that we always mean business. Low 72,500 km mileage (...kilometrage?). Spacious rear cargo area for our luggage, friends, or a hot tub.
Cons:


That's the engine. And that isn't where it belongs.



3. Arrow AX8-KT100 ~$1000



Pros: Convertible. Combine with costume party to create Mario Kart reenactment. Mouth may be held open while driving to provide supplementary meals.
Cons: Fitting 2 people and 100 lbs of luggage on it. Clearing any barrier higher than 2 inches.



4. 1990 BMW 318i $(Best Offer)



Pros: Racing tuned. Spaceship-esque cockpit. Included back-up set of wheels and tires enables (over)aggressive driving. Could easily but illegally reduce transportation time by half.

Cons: You can outrun debt collectors and jilted lovers, but you can't outrun the law.



5. 1986 Toyota Hiace "Death Van" ~$900


Pros: Bullethole decals provide instant "street cred." Optimal vehicle in the event of spontaneous zombie attack. Thorvald loves heavy metal. As the seller described, "Can cart the coffins of deceased loved ones around." "The photo was taken in May of this year. It was at a park in Nelson at a wedding. The speakers on the ground because they are blasting out Black Sabbath tunes while we wait for the Bride. You can use it at your wedding!"
Cons: May be mistaken for rapists. Loose wires could result in shocking problem. Interior beat harder than Rihanna.





6. 1966 Abbott FV433 $(Best offer)


Pros: Front-mounted 105mm Howitzer with 18.3 mile range ensures that road rage will be vindicated. Recently passed inspection. Treads render inaccessible areas accessible. Amphibious kit included. No matter how far you go, you've always got a full tank.
Cons: Mildly intimidating and slightly conspicuous.



Decisions, decisions.

go big or go home

When I get a degree, get a job, and get settled, I plan on enjoying luxuries my last four years of travel haven't afforded. Two main things are on this list: a subscription to National Geographic, and a dog. Both of those things are pretty normal, but I'm not a huge fan of that. Normal is boring. Anybody can do normal. There's not much I can do about NatGeo, that's a pretty standardized item. But the dog...well, there we have some leeway.

My classes start in 2 days, and I should be reading a document entitled "Cross-Hedging Your Security Portfolio with Futures Contracts." That's exactly why I'm dog shopping instead. I was originally thinking about a Newfoundland. A family I used to babysit for had one, and that thing was awesome. Well-mannered, loyal, relatively sedate, and the novelty of its enormous size came standard. I looked into the topic a little further though, and something else caught my eye. There's a dog with very similar characteristics, shorter hair (less shedding!), and even more massive size. It's called the English Mastiff, and I would love to cruise around the neighborhood with this thing in my back seat:



I'm no mind reader, but I'd wager that right now you're considering how impractical that dog is, on many different fronts. Practicality is boredom's less-attractive stepsister. If my job doesn't require ridiculous hours or excessive travel, I'm getting me one.

jabbing the jobless

In the fall of 2007, I was presented with an opportunity that would truly change my life. The globe program, which allowed me to visit 18 countries and 3 continents over an 8 month span, forever changed my perception of the world and yielded some friendships I'm sure will be lifelong. But opportunity sometimes comes with a price, and globe certainly did. The traditional path of an undergraduate business major involves a summer internship between the 3rd and 4th years, potentially (typically) leading to a full-time offer. Financial institutions fill between 70 and 90 percent of their entry-level positions with interns. Globe students would be studying abroad in Hong Kong during that summer. The two were mutually exclusive. Some kids accepted into the program chose the internship and dropped out. One now works at Goldman Sachs, another at Morgan Stanley, two of the most competitive, prestigious Wall Street firms.

At that time, my international experience was limited to a two-week trip to Italy in 7th grade. I knew I had the rest of my life to work, I wanted to see the world, and Globe wouldn't look half bad on a resume. I could still get a job, right? Wrong. Those same firms offering internships indirectly caused the financial crisis that, quite literally, left the world's economy retarded. Then, in response to their own blunder, they stopped hiring. They honored the full-time offers extended to the previous years' summer interns (as they should have) and locked the doors. I watched classmates and friends with inferior academic credentials head off to the jobs I wanted. That's not to diminish them, I just feel I could have been among them had I taken that route. And I don't pretend to be alone in this, the other 14 members of my program faced an equally grim job market. Most were able to find employment of some kind, but few found the same opportunities afforded to similarly qualified students the previous year. My last bastion of hope, Wachovia, was bought by Wells Fargo 2 days before my final round interview. "Don't call us, we'll call you," they said.

Even then, all hope was not lost. I got an incredible opportunity: get paid to live in a place that I absolutely love, get a Master's degree, and change pastures while the grass regrows. Sold.

Everybody knows "that guy" at a party that picks up a chip, dips it, bites it, then dips the slobber-ridden edge back in the salsa. The double-dip is a tremendously unpopular faux pas. Unfortunately, by most analyst accounts, the economy is about to do just that. One model, which has actually been relatively accurate in the past, predicts a stock crash during September and negative economic growth in the second half of 2010. Funny, those are the exact circumstances I faced two years ago.

I'm a believer that one's first job plays a considerable role in the overall trajectory of a career. I want to start off strong, but it seems as though the invisible hand of the markets serves only to bitch-slap the crap out of me. I honestly don't know what to do. My options are far more limited this time around. Continuing education gets dicey...I could go for a PhD and defer private sector entry even longer, but firms don't typically hire doctors with no work experience. And I've been more or less transient since I left for globe. With the exception of my senior year at UNC, I haven't spent more than 6 months in the same country. I'm craving a sense of permanence and some disposable income. I feel so incredibly capable of performing, and performing well, for anybody. But like the geeks at the middle school dance, it's hard to get the pretty girls to reciprocate...especially when the football team walks through the door every time you make your move.

I wouldn't trade my globe experience for a corner office at Goldman Sachs. Still, I can't help but survey my current situation and wonder what the heck to do now.

between kiwis and kangaroos- know your natives

Heritage

The two countries do stand differentiated regarding native heritage. Future Australians crossed a series of land bridges in a single, large migration to arrive from Southeast Asia somewhere between 40,000 and 120,000 years ago. These people must have annoyed the crap out of each other en route because geographic dispersion on arrival resulted in hundreds of individual colonies and 250-300 different languages. Colonies developed unique cultures, but all retained facets present prior to divergence, most notably the metaphysical concept of "Dreamtime." Dreamtime refers to a parallel, cyclical plane of existence that transcends perceived reality. Occurrences in this sea of souls shape and govern a tribe's social values. Of course, some are more capable of tapping into this spiritual realm than others. Religion often serves to stratify the masses, and Aboriginal dogma is no exception.

The association of music with The Dreaming led to the development of "song lines," melodies synonymous with certain emotions or feelings. Historians hotly debate which came next: accompanying instrumentation, or the first season of Aboriginal Idol. Many tribes began using clapping sticks (banging two sticks together) to accompany their song lines. The first didgeridoo was fashioned shortly thereafter, probably in an attempt to drown out the incessant percussion of clapping sticks. The two were found to sound quite nice together and became staples of ceremonial rites.



New Zealand was void of mankind until Polynesian settlers arrived around 1280. A small group of people boarded an even smaller group of oceangoing canoes and paddled over a thousand miles to an empty island. And nobody knows why. I've plumbed the pipes of the internets and used the google, and all I've unearthed are rather pedestrian hypotheses about food shortages and tribal disputes. I have my own theory that these people were discontent with their customs and, quite frankly, considered everybody else a bunch of weirdos. That would explain why they left and dubbed themselves Maori, meaning normal, upon colonization. Researchers insist that the name implies acknowledgment and humble disassociation from the divine, but I like my explanation better.

One of the most interesting and atypical things about the Maori is their cultural influence in New Zealand. Since America has either eradicated or marginalized its natives, this influence, to me, is incredibly pronounced. In 1840, New Zealand was composed of 100,000 Maori and 2,000 Europeans. In 1896, those numbers had changed just slightly: 42,113 Maori to over 700,000 Europeans. Sociologists assumed a distinct culture was untenable due to integration with the West, but the Maori countered by assimilating some Western elements while differentiating and exposing their own. The result has been several prominent Maori politicians and the addition of Maori to New Zealand's list of official languages (joining English and sign language) in 1987. Government offices, schools, and most business list names in both languages. Apparently there were petitions to add sign language as well, but no one showed up at the hearings. Several star players on the national rugby team are Maori, and the team performs an iconic war dance, the Haka, before every match. You can see from the Youtube video that "Haka," roughly translated, means "Woman, where's my dinner?" As a minority subgroup, they're still socioeconomically depressed, but I can't help but feel like mainstream cultural prominence is a strong road to equality.